


Your Life Through My Mouth

by thephilosophah



Series: Hold Out [2]
Category: Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Children, F/M, M/M, Marriage, Multi, Xing, ever after fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-01
Updated: 2017-08-09
Packaged: 2018-12-09 18:26:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 15,145
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11674656
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thephilosophah/pseuds/thephilosophah
Summary: As interesting as a few months packed with battles are, there are entire lifetimes of stories, bound to be important, but never written down.Never? No, not really.This is an ever-after fic. For the get-together that led to this, you can read Greed Gets His Body Back - it's the first work of this series! This picks up pretty much exactly where GGhBB left off, so I really recommend giving that a read.





	1. Not A Question

It's about four and a half months after Greed got his own body that he and Alphonse manage to stagger their way to the Imperial Castle. Ling and Lan Fan only realize because May zooms by outside the room they're in, screaming somewhere between excitement and horror, Shao May running after her at an understandably slower pace, also screaming, but probably in distress at having to run so fast.

Lan Fan drops out of the fighting stance she took on when she heard screaming, and looks at Ling. He shrugs.

A couple of servants pass by the door, failing to keep up with the princess, too out of breath to yell at her to wait for them. Lan Fan is quick to grab one of them and stop him.

He nearly keels over.

"What's going on?" she asks.

The servant wheezes for a few seconds before he realises where he is. He bows and answers to the best of his breathing abilities, "Princess May of the Chang clan is without escort. We couldn't notify her guard in time."

"Where is she going to, in such a hurry?"

"There are visitors who claim bonds with the Royal Family. She is going to the gates."

"Visitors?"

"Two men from Amestris."

Lan Fan whips her head around to Ling, who is already halfway out the door. "That's all", he says. "Lan Fan, come on."

And then they're out. They rush after the servants, passing by those who collapsed sometime during the run, passing by those who did manage to run this long but were still too slow and tired to even approach May.

Lan Fan only slows for the tiniest moment it takes to scoop up Shao May and place her on the inside of her hood.

They catch whiff of May's yelling, now quieter and almost forming words and accompanied by Alphonse's equally enthusiastic yelling. They find them on the floor, tangled up with each other, limbs and hair and sheer joy making the detangling impossible. Making the most of these few precious minutes of free time May secured with her mad sprint and the servant's exhaust.

And there Greed is, his laughter stopped dead in its tracks when Ling and Lan Fan came into view.

Ling runs. Greed almost doesn't react in time, sways heavily with Ling's weight when he crashes on him. Legs tangle around hips and fingers on necks and they are outright shameless in their kiss. It lasts too little.

Ling rests his forehead on Greed's, and that, _that_ , for some reason, is what makes the other three look away.

Alphonse catches Lan Fan's eyes and blinks like he didn't realise he had a lapful of princess on him. He nudges her off. May stays put. Al tries again with a whisper in her ear that makes her nod and stand up with a smile. She untangles her braids from him with care.

Lan Fan turns back to Greed and Ling. Ling stands to the side. Greed opens his arms.

Lan Fan isn't all that mad that she has just enough time to shove her mask up and give Greed the quickest of kisses before the servants catch up.

 

 

They all visit Fu's grave. May respectfully kneels and offers a quick prayer. Alphonse clumsily copies her. Lan Fan touches the stone and bows over it.

Greed watches it happen, waits for Ling to make his move. But he doesn't. He stands there, weight shifting left and right, left and again. Lan Fan notices, lifts her head long enough to give him a look before she bows again.

Ling, finally, clasps his hands together. He inclines his head.

And that's that, apparently.

Greed decides any religious rules regarding sinners don't apply to sins and sits on the ground cross-legged, thinks up a proper enough thanks to the old man that it could be considered a prayer.

It's fine. Fu doesn't come to haunt him, so he's probably fine.

 

 

They have to teach Greed enough Xingese that he understands what he's saying before he can give the guard oath. It takes too long.

He still acts as a guard in the meantime. He doesn't trust anyone here with his possessions' lives and Lan Fan needs sleep. Greed, less so.

He doesn't swear in, but one day Lan Fan offers him a clay mask with only the rise of her brow as a question.

It wasn't a question, of course. Greed never let it be. Plus, the mask is painted to look like his Shielded face. What gives him pause is the Yang mark on the forehead.

"I can't take this", he says. "That was his- that's _his_ symbol. I can't - I'm not here to-"

His voice isn't shaking, but his hands are. Lan Fan stands on tip toes to tie the ribbon around his head. "You won't", she says. "You _can't_ replace him. But I want you to have this. I want you to wear it."

Greed doesn't stop her, other than a tiny flinch when the clay lays on his face. He lets her fit it on him and she stands down to look at him for a moment.

Have her eyes always been so visible under her mask?

She goes on tip toes again and does the unthinkable. She presses her forehead on Greed's, bringing their masks' symbols together.

Now it's that Greed freaks out. This is Ling's thing, this is Ling's this-- "This is Ling's thing."

"This is a different thing", she says. "His is a thought thing. This is a symbol thing."

Greed is still unnerved, but he takes it. He always takes all he can. He leans down against her.

She sighs. "Share this with me."

It was never a question, for fuck's sake. "I will."

 

 

Once he has the mask, no one questions his presence anymore. Not out loud, not like before. Before, he could flash his fangs (on a good day) or show his Shield (if Lan Fan was there) or straight-up take a life (on a bad day, always after consulting with Ling). The people living in and working at the castle can still feel his monster soul or whatever they called it. But no one dares ask for an explanation now.

So the mask is pretty welcome.

The job that comes with it, not so much.

A good chunk of Greed's life - if not all of it - was spent living in figurative shadows, underground cliques, hiding from the right people and escaping daddy's grasp. The literal shadows he's now expected to be in, hidden from view completely, are absolute shit. Before, he could be as flashy as he wanted. Now the only part of him allowed to be visible is the white of his mask.

Lan Fan can try all she wants, she won't convince him to wear the combat sleeves she offered. Sun's out gun's out, and there's always sun somewhere on the world.

He hides his skin in carbon if he needs. Hand-to-hand combat is hilarious.

Ling and Lan Fan explain with confusion the attempts at the (not-yet) Emperor's life are so few it's honestly remarkable. They explain how often it is that dying Emperors choose heirs too young to take the throne immediately, the laws in place and the council that helps the Emperor-to-be until he's old enough to rule. They explain the grace period between one Emperor's death and the next one's coronation is usually packed with assassination attempts, a lot of which being successful.

Greed laughs. "I'm here", he says. "If anyone was dumb enough to approach you, they'd have to deal with me. And your people are smart enough not to."

Hell.

Lan Fan could deal better with assassins - she knew their tricks, she'd been with Ling all her life. But it didn't hurt that Greed was warding them off by virtue of existing.

 

 

Ling is crowned Emperor a few weeks after his twentieth birthday. There are a few bits still controlled or at least influenced by the council, but Ling is now the Emperor of Xing, even without full control.

The same night (after an exhausting eight-hour dinner) Ling kneels in front of Lan Fan and touches his forehead on her knees.

She panics. Drops. Rushes to get her head lower than her Emperor's.

"My Emperor please, don't do this."

"I'll do whatever I want. Whose eyes are you afraid of? No one's watching."

Greed is watching. Lan Fan cups Ling's jaw instead of commenting, tilts it up as she tilts her head down to bring Ling's higher. "Do not bow."

"Lan Fan."

"Anything else, literally anything else you ask of me, I will accept. Not this."

"I ask that you not die for me."

"Fuck you, Ling."

Ling laughs. "Is that what it takes to get the guarding out of you?"

"You can't take that", Lan Fan says as she takes off her mask. "I'm sorry I swore at you."

"Aw come on, none of that. I'm not somehow above or more for this."

Lan Fan frowns at him.

"Okay, true", he concedes. "But you can't ask me not to treat you with respect."

"Not this kind of respect."

"All kinds of respect. I do what I want. Who the absolute fuck will stop me?"

Lan Fan sighs and finally lets her hands drop, lets Ling's head fall and nestle under her chin.

Greed thinks this is a good moment to butt in, if any, but he doesn't. He stays up in his corner of the ceiling instead, weirdly happy that the kids let him stay there while they solve their own issues.

Lan Fan sleeps a solid twelve hours in Ling's arms that night. Not one of them can remember when that last happened.

 

 

With the train rails over the desert in progress, and Alphonse's unending love for everyone he knows, he travels back and forth often enough that the gate guards and a number of servants learnt to recognise him and allow him proper access to the Palace. When Edward first comes along, it's a whole nother mess, because Alphonse still isn't trusted enough to bring in people of his own.

Greed sneaks out to the gates to solve the issue, 'sneaking' here meaning 'parading over with his shield down and his mask hung over his back', of course, because his whereabouts are always obvious to everyone.

"Yo", he says, helpfully, when he sees the brothers arguing with the gate guards.

"Greed, you fuck!" Edward smiles. "Man, have I missed you! It's been years! Tell these shitheads to let me through."

"Now that's just rude. What if one or both of them could speak Amestrian, huh? They'd really not let you in."

"They don't, because if they did, I'd have told them myself instead of dragging Al to translate. Tell them!"

Greed snorts and says, in Xingese, "That man is Alphonse's elder brother, and a good friend of the Emperor's. He is trustworthy."

"How can we know?" one of the guards asks with a frown.

"Because I said so", Greed says, "And my word is worth more than yours." He considers, for a moment, putting on the shield for emphasis, but the guards just exchange a look and bow, letting the brothers in.

"Thanks", says Alphonse to the guards. He then gives Greed a Look(tm).

"What."

"That was oddly proper of you."

"Proper how?" Edward asks.

Greed whips his head around. "Did you hear what just came out of my mouth? I don't know what country _you're_ learning Xingese from, Al, but they, at least, learnt it in this country, and took it as a threat. As they _should've."_

"How was that a threat?" Alphonse asks, throwing his head back.

"Because I'm a _bodyguard_. My word _shouldn't_ have been worth shit, but it is, and that scares them. Ling trusts me so whatever shit I say passes over whatever shit those guys say, because Ling - you may have noticed - is the Emperor."

"But you said it so politely. How the hell did what you said translate to _that?"_

Greed rolls his eyes with a groan. "They teach me Palace talk. I don't know how to make that casual."

"That's weird", Alphonse frowns. "May teaches me a lot of variations for the same thing."

"That's not weird. They just don't trust me to not swear up a storm in important people's faces."

"You wouldn't do that."

Edward and Greed laugh at the same time.

 

 

Edward can't throw knives for his life. Alphonse isn't too good at it, but he can hit a target, or at least miss it by a tiny bit. Edward can barely get a knife halfway to the distance it needs to go.

May, of course, finds it hilarious.

Edward, less so.

To his credit, Alphonse tries to help despite his giggles.

"Brother you have two dominant hands, you literally don't have an excuse."

And that's the story of how Princess May of the Chang clan had to pause an alkahestry lesson to detangle two wrestling brothers from each other, the floor, and a curtain they had somehow rolled into.

 


	2. Hitch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> an assassination attempt and a wedding

For once, Ling has two bedmates to sleep with. Greed is weirdly warm as usual so they don't need any extra blankets or anything to make up for sleeping naked. It's safe and cozy between the two guards. The bed is stupidly wide so they can stretch if they want to, but at the moment it seems 'snuggled as close as possible' is the way to go.

Lan Fan snaps up.

Ling opens his eyes, forces himself to read past Greed's overwhelming qi to see what the fuck alarmed Lan Fan. He finds a stranger approaching through the northen corridor, doing their best to hide themselves.

Greed stirs, finally notices the other two aren't sleeping anymore.

"What", he whispers.

Lan Fan turns outwards, toward the door. Greed blinks at it for a moment.

Then it predictably slides open, silent if not for the soft inhale of the intruder.

"Ours?" Greed asks.

"No", Lan Fan says. She makes her metal arm click.

The intruder is too awe-struck to move, even when she registers that she's compromised and in far more danger than she probably planned to be.

"Give me a moment", Greed says. He pats Lan Fan's flesh shoulder as he goes, telling her to lie down again (which she doesn't do).

Greed walks lazily to the would-be assassin, pushes her out and slides the door shut behind him as he steps out after her. Ling breathes. He doesn't hear anything.

Lan Fan apparently does. She gets goosebumps and then she sighs, pushing her hair out of her eyes. Ling takes her wrist.

"Lie back down."

"No. We wait for him."

Ling hides his face in her bare thigh. "I'm more worried than you are, okay? I know what the inside of his brain is like."

Lan Fan combs her fingers through his hair. "I know. That does not mean I don't worry."

Greed comes back, door opening and closing slowly, sluggishly. Clearly it was Such A Bother to get out of bed.

Ling whistles. "Cover up, that how you walk around the castle halls?"

Greed flips him off but still throws a Shield all the way up to his waist.

Lan Fan frowns at both of them. She opens her arms.

"Gimme a moment sweetheart", Greed says. He takes a rug from the shelf and sits on the edge of the bed, goes about getting the blood off his hands. Then his face. Then his chest, he keeps looking for where the damn blood managed to splash to, and clean it off.

He slouches down. Like a melting candle he buries his face in his hands and takes a shaky breath.

"Come here", Lan Fan says, arms still wide open.

"I'm not getting near either of you."

"Greed, it's fine. It's just blood; it won't hurt us."

"It's disgusting."

"Greed-"

Ling climbs out from under the covers, crawls over to Greed, wraps his arms around those slumped shoulders.

Greed resumes his cleaning, at last. When he drops the rug to the floor Ling takes it as the cue to drag his guard back to the top of the bed and under the covers, where he should be.

They put Greed in the middle.

 

 

"Pardon?"

"You heard me the first time. I said, I'm removing the blood successor system. From now on, anyone can attempt to gain the Emperor's favour for their clan."

The consultant blinks again, as if he needs it repeated a third time to believe it. "Whu- What lead you to this decision, my Emperor?"

"I lost too much to get the last Emperor's favour. Putting all the weight of a clan's future on a single successor is ridiculous and frankly outrageous. I won't stand for it."

"Still, my lord, surely you'd prefer your own children to make decisions for this Empire? After all, there are to be many children, and thus the, uh, the weight would be shared among them."

"I'm putting an end to that too. Don't line up any wives for me; they're free to do as they please."

"My Emperor, that is unheard of. It will not be beneficial for the Empire nor the clans."

Ling stands up from his throne. The consultant twitches under his fancy hat.

"Your concern is noted. But I won't see Xingese children fight even a fraction of the fights I fought. If the clan leaders want to choose representatives themselves, so be it; but they must be grown and willing. Their blood relation to the royal family shall be irrelevent."

"My Lord! You'd see a successor of common blood?"

"I'd prefer it over what is happening now."

The consultant has the mind to hold his tongue before the acid on it spills out, but Ling is the Emperor now, and officially the master of the Dragon's Pulse. And the Pulse on the consultant is _ringing._

"My Emperor, I beg of you. Reconsider. I understand the point of a clan-chosen representative. But your adamancy to limit the royal bloodline is unreasonable."

"On the contrary; past royal members are to keep their titles even if I were to procreate. In turn, those members can pass down their titles to their own heirs. The royal family will grow immensely, I assure you."

"I do not mean to disrespect you, my Emperor, by any means. But still, your own bloodline, the Emperor's bloodline, should be the one that carries royal blood."

"Oh and it'll stop doing so once I die? The previous Emperor's children still have their titles; why should that change if I have children? And what if I don't? This system is flawed. I'm making it so Xing will never be without ruler. Can you imagine the chaos that situation would cause?"

"Of course, of course, I understand. I know you only have our country's best interest in mind, lord, but I'm concerned about what the people will say."

"I don't."

"Pardon?"

"I don't only have our country in mind. I will admit to you, right now, and take the information as you want, that I have my own reasons for this change, and they're personal as much as they are selfish. I told you two of them already: I don't want my children killing each other and I don't want anyone to go through what I did."

"...There are more, my Emperor?"

"Yes. I was planning on waiting for the rest of the council to announce it, but would you like to know now, Shun?"

The consultant swallows. He sweats, suddenly, a nervous hand going up to rearrange his clothes' fold around his neck. The Emperor does not address names, not outside of family. Not in this room. Not without carrying the threat along. "My Emperor?"

"I don't want to marry fifty wives, Shun." Ling sighs, now, like it hurts that he has to explain. "There's only one woman I want at my side, and it isn't any of those you were planning for me."

Lan Fan climbs out from behind the throne, and she takes her mask off. If Shun felt threatened before, he must be dreaming now.

"This is Lan Fan. I'll marry her."

Shun gapes like a fish. "One woman? You'll marry one, common woman?"

"I also want a second spouse. A husband, in fact. Greed the Avaricious. You know him."

Greed drops down from his perch on the ceiling planks. He walks to Ling's other side, mask off and arms naked as always.

"Everyone knows him."

Shun, of course, now has to accept that this is reality, with a goddamn monster's qi in his face. Can't dream that one up.

"You must be joking."

"Are you questioning your Emperor's word, Shun? I'm marrying these two with or without your approval - nothing short of them changing minds will stop that."

"Them?" Shun starts shaking. " _Them??? Their minds?_ Are you telling me you felt the need to _ask_ them?"

"Ew", says Greed. "Y'all are messed up."

"He spoke", Shun frowns.

"You'll mind your tone to them both", Ling growls. "You can set the council against me if that's what you're going to do but you will respect my guards now and you will respect them when they're my spouses." Ling is too close to Shun. "You're too ignorant to judge either of them - you have no idea what they've done." With a fistfull of Shun's long jacket, Ling bares his teeth. "Do you have any objections."

Shun breathes too quick. "Yes, but they can be overruled. My Emperor."

"Good. Then we can talk about them like actual people instead of threatening each other like some pawns of a power neither of us can have without the other. I'm not trying to sidestep you as a member of the counsil, Shun. I just really love these two. I want to marry them. And they want to marry me too. I really don't see why some old law should keep us from it."

Shun straightens his clothes now that he's released, glances awkwardly at the two guards.

"Ay don't look at me like you're ever gonna like me", Greed shrugs. "I'm not even Xingese."

"You're not even a human", Lan Fan offers. "Your country of origin is hardly an issue."

Shun looks at the ground. "If nothing else", he breathes, "if nothing else will deter you, my lord, please consider that they're your guards. Irreplaceable by experience alone. What will happen if your relationship changes."

"Oh", Ling goes. "You have no idea, do you? It's already changed - it's been like this from the start. I grew up with Lan Fan. Greed lived in me when his immortality was mine. Neither of them will let any of that get in the way of keeping me safe. Quite the contrary, in fact."

Shun nods, keeps his eyes on the floor. "I understand. I need time to think about... about this, and about the law changes you suggested."

"Of course. Can you come up with something by next week? I'd rather be married by my 25th birthday. I don't wanna be fully coronated without them with me."

"Oh." Shun almost looks up, but he keeps his head down still. "What... what titles will they have?"

"My spouses", Ling shrugs. "Empress can work for Lan Fan, but we can't have another Emperor, I guess... King, perhaps, will do."

Greed tries to stifle a snort, fails miserably. "King my ass, fuck that old promise, Ling", he says in Amestrian.

"Ay, the Xingese keep their word", Ling answers in kind. "You're dismissed", he says to Shun, in Xingese again.

Shun bows and all but sprints out of the room.

"So why'd he take sudden interest in your shoes, kid?" Greed says.

Lan Fan laughs. "It's tradition to keep the Emperor's wives out of sight before the wedding. It doesn't last for too long - usually there's only a few weeks, if not days, between the choosing of the wife and her wedding. Shun was... hehe, he was keeping his eyes off us." She turns to Greed. "He just accepted that there would be a wedding. It's a good thing."

Greed's grin spreads slowly across his face, splits it to halves. He thrusts his fist in the air and jumps up high.

 

 

"Pretty please with sugar and a million sweet cherries on top?"

"No, Greed."

"Not even if I take over your guard shifts for a month?"

"Tempting, but still no."

"What if I eat you out super nicely?"

"I was more interested in the time off, but good offer."

"Wow, I'm actually offended. I can't believe my work is worth more than my mouth."

"Ling's life is worth more than your sexual experience, yes."

"He's not gonna die if we take shorter shifts! Goddamn, Lan Fan, he's more dangerous than a couple of my siblings, you know that! Hell, he's more dangerous than me! He can take care of himself. We lost our point, though. Pretty please?"

"Begging is dreadful behaviour."

"I'm a literal sin."

"Listen, my answer is still no, but if you feel like you absolutely must, then I won't stop you. Just ask Ling beforehand, please?"

"Sure thing love, you won't regret it!"

 

 

"Ling can I wear Amestrian clothes for the wedding?"

"Pfffffhahahaha what the fuck? Do you know how ridiculous that'll look?"

"I'm not wearing that fucking thing."

"Oh, come on. It'll be fine."

"I'm willing to suck dick for a proper damn suit."

"Done deal my dear, but you'll probably have to have it sent over the mail."

 

 

May bowls her eyes out at the wedding. Mustang and Hawkeye stick close to each other, as if their being in another country where nobody knows them will change the fact that they are, at the moment, with old friends. Ross goes as far as to start conversation on old people being in love but not married, a conversation which gets quickly derailed by Hawkeye kissing the sass out of Mustang. No one dares to comment on his mild behaviour for the rest of the day.

The next day, after Edward and Winry manage 24 hours of shaking with an obvious, barely held secret, is apparently the best time for Things to Happen.

It's just after breakfast, the Elric brothers and Ross are the only ones left at the table, late as it is.

(The royal table, the one only Ling and his family are supposed to use. Big family, huh.)

Ross finally stands up to put her dishes away, Edward breathes a long sigh of relief.

Then Lan Fan walks in.

"Oh my fuck", Edward says, "I'm going to lose my fucking mind."

"What's wrong?"

"Fuck this, Lan Fan, can you keep a secret for the day? We wanna tell everyone ourselves."

Lan Fan puts her bowl down. "Like a grave."

"Perfect. Al, dear brother", Edward says, nudging Alphonse's arm.

"You're kinda scaring me."

"Al, you love me, right?"

"Oh no, what did you do?"

"Nothing! Well, I mean, I did things, but not bad things. Good things, actually. Very good. They're gonna get us family to be with."

Alphonse looks at Lan Fan, then over his shoulder through the door to the others who've woken up already. "We have a pretty big family."

"Yeah, I guess", Edward says, leaning casually on his arm. "But you don't have a nibling yet."

Alphose, slow waker that he is, takes a full minute to process it.

"YOU'RE SHITTING ME!"

"Swear I'm not!"

"BROTHER YOU FUCK"

"Yes, that's me!"

Alphonse drops his voice to a whisper again. "Look me in the eye and swear you're serious."

"I'm serious. Al, it's happening."

"Oh my god. Oh my. God! You're having a baby?"

"Yes! Winry is insanely excited, she's been dying to gush about it! But we were waiting for the wedding, and then I couldn't catch you alone-"

"Nevermind all that brother, you're gonna be a father!"

"That rhymed."

"I'm gonna be an uncle!"

"Yes!"

Lan Fan watches, to her great amusement, the two brothers scream at each other while she drinks her coffee. Eventually the screaming attracts company. Winry, specifically, since she knows what it's all about. She kneels down between her husband and her brother-in-law and the three share a glorious big hug.

Lan Fan puts her cup down. "Congratulations", she says. "But you'll be disappointed to know that I figured it out before."

Winry cocks her head to the side. "You did?"

"Dragon's Pulse", she shrugs. "I share a lot of lessons with Ling, I can almost read it as well as he does. Your qi was quite wild, and there's a small presence in your belly. I figured you hadn't swallowed anything alive."

Edward looks disturbed at having that mental image so early in the morning, but Winry and Alphonse just laugh.

"Speaking of Ling, where is he?"

Lan Fan sighs. Considers her options. "I don't hate you enough to tell you. No wait, I can suggest it. Ling is... hm. Ling is between Greed's legs, is that subtle enough?"

The brothers both groan. Winry just laughs. "I thought it was supposed to be a wedding night only?"

"With _Greed_ involved? Have you met the guy?"

"I haven't seen him in years, dear."

"Well these two can tell you all about it while I leave you all to share the news."

"You're leaving? Where are you going?"

Lan Fan raises her eyebrows, waits for the hint to hit. "We're not gonna leave that room unless Ling actually collapses on us. I'm bringing them food but Ling's sure to go hungry by nightfall. Anyway, see you all tomorrow, hopefully at least one of us will be able to walk."

 

 

Nightfall.

Like a cryptid Ling appears on the edge of several people's vision, but when they turn he's not there. The only exception is the Hawk's Eyes, surprising no one.

"Evening, miss Hawkeye."

"Evening, Emperor. Rumor has it your night's been interesting."

Ling pauses with the bun in his hand frozen for a moment before he continues filling the crook of his elbow with snacks. "For some reason I always thought you were the kinda person that would avoid gossip."

"What an odd assumption." She punctuates with a bite from her sandwich.

"Anyway, night was fine. Day, too. Really fine, actually, the worst thing that's happened was Lan Fan's absence when she went for food. Mind if I sit?"

Hawkeye opens her palm to the other side of the table, where Ling promptly drops his loot and takes a seat. He then begins eating, exhibiting his infamous ability to hold a proper conversation mid-meal.

"Have you heard Edward and Winry's news?" Hawkeye says. "I wasn't sure if they told Lan Fan, and you haven't left your room all day..."

"Oh yeah she told us they told her. But I knew. Winry has that-", he frees a hand to make a wiggly motion, "-wild type of Pulse on her, like every part of her insides is rebelling. You know, the hormone thing. Plus, she has a second heartbeat. You should've seen me when they all first arrived, I was so confused. And they were still too far away for anyone else to tell, so I didn't say anything about it."

Hawkeye nods along. She finishes her sandwich and gets a cup of coffee going.

"Actually, miss Hawkeye, I was a bit scared, I thought I was reading the Pulse wrong. Then I read Greed meeting with them and I could pinpoint them so well I could all but see their expressions. So I figured she was with child. Would you like a bun?"

"Oh no, I don't really like them, sorry."

"Okay then." Ling swallows the bun whole. Hawkeye watches in mild horror.

"You sure are eating a lot. Really fast. Don't choke."

Ling pauses for a drink of tea. "I'm so tempted to make a dirty joke. Greed is bad infulence. But no, I won't choke, miss Hawkeye. Don't worry about me."

"Now _I'm_ tempted to make a dirty joke."

"You can if you want to. It'd be funny."

"Alright then. How can you be sure you won't choke?"

"That was poorly executed."

"Let me try again. I know you won't choke on your food, but are you sure you won't choke at all?"

Ling laughs. "Much better. We're not actually-- no wait, you're a guest, I have to be subtle. We're not really doing anything. We're just chilling. Greed put on a tape on the radio and we're doing maintenance on Lan Fan's arm. See this braid?" Ling turns his head and brings his hair forth with a hand to show that it is, in fact, braided. A fishatail braid, actually. "All Greed. Apparently Envy the Jealous loved getting their hair braided, and Lust the Lascivious didn't have anyone else to teach Greed on."

Hawkeye nods. Suddenly she's too aware that she's seen all three of those Homunculi die, and that's all the Homunculi she's seen do so.

"Hearing him talk about them is a hurricane."

"I can only imagine."

"Maybe we can get him to chat it out a bit in front of company. If you're interested."

"No, don't go to troubles for me."

"Thanks. And thanks for listening. How are you finding your stay here?"

"It's lovely. Way fancier than what I'm used to. A bit chilly, maybe. Overall great."

"I can get you a blanket if you'd like."

"No, that's... not what I meant, I'm plenty warm under covers. If you have some warm socks you can share, though..."

"Sadly no, Xingese socks tend to be thin. Especially in the Palace. Despite the carpets, I need access to the ground so I can use the Dragon's Pulse. But maybe Mustang can warm you up?"

Hawkeye laughs. "I told you, I'm plenty warm when I sleep."

"Uh huh sure. Now if you'll excuse my short stay, I already miss my spouses." Ling giggles, a giddy little sound. "My spouses! That feels so good to say. Anyway, I have confusing blueprints and tiny oil cans to get back to, I'll see you tomorrow if any of us can walk."

"Why wouldn't you be able to walk?"

"I may have said we're hanging out, miss Hawkeye, but we're still a bit too greedy not to mess around while we're at it."

 

 

"Ling showed his face?"

"Yes, and stuffed it full."

"Pch, should've known. Anyway, what'd the bastard say? There's no way they're still going at it."

"We had a chat. He said we'll see them tomorrow if any of them can walk."

"Fucker said what."

 

 

Sometime too early to be morning and too late to be night, Lan Fan runs into a sleepy-looking May who quickly turns into flustered-looking May.

"Lan Fan! There you are, I haven't seen you all day. What are you doing up at this hour?"

"I'm going to empty my bladder so I don't have to move too much around later because I can't, in fact, walk. What are _you_ doing up?"

May turns bright red. "Um, sleepwalking?"

"An alkahestrist? Please. Are you sneaking around?"

"Well, um, you see..."

"I won't tell on you, you know that. Are you safe? What's wrong?"

"I'm fine! I'm safe, Lan Fan, don't worry. I was, uh, going for a midnight snack."

"It's almost breakfast time. Also, princess, I can tell you're lying, please give me some more credit. I follow most of the Emperor's lessons, I know how to read the Pulse better than you by now. No offence."

May sighs, accepting her fate, petting Shao May on the head. "I was just at Alphonse's room. Please don't tell, Ling won't let me hear the end of it."

"I won't tell, but I will have a talk with Alphonse."

"Don't threaten him!"

"I will."

"Lan Fan!"

"Princess."

 

 

"She's back!" is Greed's greeting when Lan Fan makes her way to the room again, half-limping, half supporting herself on the walls. "In record time! Recon that was just over a half-hour, right?"

"About so, yes", Ling yawns. "Now sleep."

Greed shifts under Ling, stirring him in the process. "Any news from the outside world?"

"I have some, but I promised not to tell."

"Is it bad news?" Ling says, one eye opening in alarm.

"Neutral and expected. Actually it depends on how you see it. But I was glad to hear it, if you're willing to trust me on that." She sits criss cross on the bed, frowns, opts to lie down instead. "Ow."

"I'll trust you", Ling says, the fool, burying his face back in Greed's chest and falling to sleep.

"How was the walk from here to there and back, though?" Greed says, quietly so he won't wake Ling, ignoring the fact that his voice resonates in his chest. "I mean. Considering."

"Manageable. I wouldn't repeat it for a few hours if I can."

"Oh so I'm a lost cause, then?"

"You could always heal yourself out of the pain."

"I'd rather fucking claw my brain out."

Lan Fan shrugs, sleepy blink blurring her vision. "If that's what you want."

 

 

"Alphonse! Good morning."

Alphonse turns his head around to look over his shoulder. "Ah, Lan Fan. It's afternoon."

Lan Fan limps around the couch and kneels on the other side of the table. "I missed the morning, what could I do?" She puts her elbow on the table, hand under her chin. "How was your morning?"

"Lovely. I love the breakfasts here. Why don't you sit in the chair?"

Lan Fan presses her mouth in a thin line. "It'll hurt me."

"Why would- oh. Oh okay." He dives behind the book he's holding.

"How did you sleep?"

Alphonse lowers the book to his lap. He narrows his eyes. "What do you know?"

"I ran into May on her way out."

He giggles. "Are you gonna give me The Talk?"

"Answer me first."

"I slept gloriously, Lan Fan, how did _you_ sleep?"

"Gloriously. I will now give you The Talk."

"Oh no."

"Oh yes. Alphonse Elric-"

"Lan Fan I love you, you wouldn't hurt me-"

"-you may not be religious, but I assure you-"

"-after all we've been together, all the adventures, the fun, the near-death experiences-"

"-you'd better start praying that I never, and I do mean not once, so much as suspect you have anything but the best in mind for May, or you will not find a place to hide on this entire planet where I won't hunt you down, you won't even _fly_ fast enough to escape me. You will die."

"-oh fuck why-"

"Slowly and painfully depending on the severity of your crime. Do not toy with her and we will be fine."

"I won't! Lan Fan what the fuck, you know I won't, shit, I couldn't dream of it! Just thinking about it makes me sick, ugh, why? I trusted you and you make me think this disgusting thing. I'll never share my cookies with you again. Our friendship is suspended."

Lan Fan smiles. Nods. "That's a correct answer."

"I'd hope so! Ew, I have it stuck in my head now. Swear to fuck, I cause her pain? I will jump off a cliff."

Lan Fan nods again. "Mm, good. By the way, do you think your brother has gotten to her? I'd hate to leave her to face _his_ Talk alone."

"Oh yeah, but it was fine, brother just gave her a mean face and said 'keep him happy'. Winry was more of an issue."

"I'd imagine. Ah, can I put our friendship out of suspension with a bribe of intel?"

"Shoot."

"Ling's Talk will involve punching. Greed will probably just dangle his immortality over your head as a threat, so he's safe, but watch out for Ling."

"Hmm, yeah, I'll take it. We're friends again."

"Nice."

 

 

"Well then, we should go or we'll miss our train. It was lovely staying with you all."

"Are you sure you can't stay? Like Alphonse and miss Ross? I'll miss your company, Winry."

"Oh, no, sorry. I want to finish my first trimester back home. But you know you can come whenever."

"Of course. I hope I'll see you soon."

"Me too. Oh, before I go, Lan Fan?"

"Yes?"

"Did you marry Greed along with Ling?"

"Of course."

"Ah, I wasn't sure. Xingese wedding rules cover that?"

"No, but one of my husbands is literally the rule-maker. You may have noticed."

"Haha, right. Take care."

"You too. Good luck with your kid."

 

 

After the train rails over the desert are done, it's not long before telephone lines follow. About two entire telephone lines, in fact. That work for maybe two hours around noon, weather permitting.

Overall a good idea and a useless praxis.

 

 

Rule of the thumb for guards is, a new one every five or so years, a replacement every twenty to thirty. Meaning Lan Fan can drop out any minute now, especially since she's also the Empress. Greed hears about the rule once and his attention slides right the fuck over it.

 


	3. Happy Birthday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> !!discussion of slavery in this chapter!!  
>  if you want to avoid it, you can completely skip over this chapter, i promise there's absolutely no plot whatsoever

They're out on the roof (that everyone insists on calling the "upstairs balcony" for some reason). Greed is stargazing because, well. Ling and Lan Fan are elbow-deep in paperwork Greed can't short out. So he's just hanging.

A distant ring in the distance lets him know it's midnight, and that's all the warning he gets before Ling tackles him.

Lan Fan follows soon enough, hushing Ling's rapid bubbling with a hand over his mouth.

"Happy birthday", she says.

Greed blinks. Points at himself.

"Yes, you. You told us, remember? You promised."

"I did?"

Ling takes Lan Fan's hand in his own before he speaks. "Oh no, you're not getting out of this. You said you'll answer any fucking question we ask when you turn two hundred."

Greed does some math, counts back, takes stock of the time he spent in-between existence in his deaths. "Huh, so I did. I didn't think this far. Whatever, lay it on me. I have all the answers."

Lan Fan swats at him with a smile. "Did you really, actually consider the other homunculi your siblings?"

"Some. Lust, Gluttony, Envy, for sure. Pride, a little bit. Not Sloth or Wrath though. I never got to hang out with either of them."

"Was it... was it fun hanging out with the rest?"

"Oh yeah, definitely. They each had their own, you know, sin thing they lived with, but my sin thing included theirs. I was probably the only person they ever related to, in some ways."

"What."

"Like. Gluttony. Do y'all know what gluttony - the sin, not my brother - is?"

"Eating?" Lan Fan tries.

"Eating too much?" Ling also tries. "I mean. He ate me."

"He also got eaten. But no, close enough. It's, uhm. I don't know the Xingese word for it."

"What is it?" Ling says, in Amestrian.

"Overindulgence."

"I don't know what that means." Ling looks at Lan Fan, who looks back with a frown.

"When, like..." Greed suddenly misses the ability to shoot ideas directly into Ling's head. "When you let yourself have too much, to the point where it's unhealthy, it hurts you and it hurts everyone around you. It's usually depicted as a food thing, yeah, but it can be anything."

"Overindulgence", Lan Fan tests the word, brutally murdering it in the process.

"Overindulgence", Greed says. "Indulge means to let happen, or to let have."

"Like allow?"

"No, like... um. The point of indulging is enjoyment, you indulge in something you enjoy. Allow can be about something you don't like, it's a neutral thing. Indulge is for a good thing."

"Then how is it sin enough to have named one of you?"

"The first part of the word is _over_. As in, too much. Everyone needs to eat; but like you said, Gluttony ate entire worlds."

"Overindulgence", Lan Fan says again, getting it more or less right this time.

"There, see? Now you get it. Though we said it so many times it barely sounds like a word to me anymore."

"So gluttony is overindulgence. How does that connect to you?"

"I just said, it means to let oneself enjoy too much of a thing. Or, getting all of that thing."

"Ooh, getting. Cause your sin is to have everything."

"Yeah, you get it. So, for example, Gluttony liked to eat everything and all of one thing."

"I thought you demanded the _finer things_ in life?"

"Yes Ling, thank you. The point here is that Gluttony had a thing in common with me the others didn't: the illusion that this empty bit inside us could be filled."

Greed had stopped clutching his shirt every time he mentioned it, but he still puts a hand over his chest now.

Ling scoots closer. Lan Fan climbs in Greed's lap.

"Like. We always thought that if we did too much, or if we found just the right thing to do, the void would fill. I mean, Pride never had that, he just had to deal with the fact that everyone was below him. Envy had to live knowing everyone was above them. Sloth had to live with the world's constant movement and the horror of being the fastest thing alive when all he wanted was to stop."

Lan Fan cups Greed's cheeks and shakes him out of his trance. "You with us, love?"

Greed blinks. "Yeh. You get what I'm getting at."

"Yes."

"So the easy connections are Lust and Envy, one wants to fuck everyone and the other wants everything everyone else has."

"Those apply to you to some extent as well, yes."

"Pride was... okay, this is tricky to explain, I'll just give ya the plain bit - his certainty that he was rightfully better than anyone else paired with my certainty that everything rightfully belongs to me."

Ling furrows his brow. "You lost me."

"This... assurance, this belief that - that everything we had, we deserved, and much more", Greed fumbles. "That the world is stupid for - for not seeing that it owed us more. That we should've been treated better."

Lan Fan catches his twitchy hands, brings them to her lips. "If it upsets you we can drop it."

"No, it's-" he looks at Ling. "Do you get me?"

"Kinda. You never got sentimental about this stuff when we were one."

Greed buries his face in Lan Fan's shoulder with a groan. "Forget it, I don't know why I bother. I can't explain my brain. I just had things in common with Pride too, okay?"

"Okay."

A moment passes, two. Lan Fan taps her metal fingers on Greed's back to an unheard beat.

"Was Lust your first?"

Greed laughs in Lan Fan's chest. "What the fuck, Ling?"

"You said you'd answer."

"No, no she wasn't. She had the decency to hunt her sin outside so, I didn't know what the deal with sex was until I had it. Actually I'm pretty sure the first time Lust and I interacted in a sexual situation was a solid five years after my birth or so."

Lan Fan frowns. "Please for the love of fuck tell me you spring fully-formed and adult-brained out of your father, and not that you had sex with your sister when you were five years old."

"I _was_ five, though."

"Greed please, you're making me sick."

"No yeah we spring fully-formed and adult-brained. Also this body is like, seven."

"Okay now you're getting logistics into it."

"Yeah whatever, what I was saying is, we didn't fuck when I was five, I'm... pretty sure she hooked me up with one of her flings by making out with him then throwing him at me."

"So when did you fuck?"

"Around 1740, or so?? Envy was fresh out the oven, but old enough to start doing their own thing. I'm pretty sure I fucked with Lust only once or twice before--"

Lan Fan looks down, finds Greed's hair. Ling fits his chin over her shoulder, peeks at Greed as well. "Before what?"

Greed looks up. "You know we're all supposed to be parts of the Dwarf, right? We embody his desires and shit."

"Yes?"

"So we were made in his image."

"Yes."

Greed hides in Lan Fan's collarbone again. "Stop looking at me like that, you're making this very difficult."

"Make what difficult?"

"Oh dear Lord", Greed mumbles. "Please tell me at least one of you has wondered why Lust was the only woman homuculus."

The two exchange a look. Ling tilts his head. "Not really? But now that you mention it..."

"I always figured it was random", Lan Fan says. "You said Envy didn't have a gender."

"Envy invented the whole thing", Greed sighs. "We were made in the Dwarf's image, we were all dudes at first." He sits up again. "But Envy could change their form. Eventually we stopped thinking about them in gendered terms, and Envy was all about that so they pretty much came up with the singular use of 'they' to fit them. And Lust was... well. Lust asked Father for a reformation and he didn't care enough to refuse her, so he made her... her. You get me."

"We get you."

"My point is we only fucked like once before Lust changed, and Envy was made around summer 1737, so I was at least fifteen."

Lan Fan groans. "Please stop making it sound like you age like a human. It's creeping me out."

Ling kisses her shoulder. "Any other sibling you fucked?"

"Envy. I'm pretty sure Gluttony wouldn't have fucked me if I paid him."

"So how was it to hang out with Gluttony?"

"Cute. Mostly we'd run around getting each other things we wanted. Food, money, women, you know. Whatever worked."

"Oh yeah, a thing that's always bugged me", Ling says, finally getting his face out of Lan Fan's neck, "Why'd you always say 'women'? I mean, you had 'sex' later in your list, it seemed a bit redundant. Also you clearly don't go by gender." He gestures at himself.

"I confess", Greed says, hands up. "I made the slogan up back when women could actually be owned, and never bothered to change it. It changed meaning, sure, but people still got what I was getting at."

Ling frowns. "That. Is so fucked up."

"This, from the guy whose job description included fifty wives?"

"Enough", Lan Fan says. She puts a hand over each of the others' faces. "I don't want to hear it."

"Sorry", they chorus.

"But on that topic", she sighs, "Did you ever really own a woman?"

"You mean, legally?"

"Yeah."

"Yes. Sorry."

"Men?"

"Slaves."

"What's the difference?"

"Between...?"

"The women you owned and these slave men."

Greed looks off to the side. "The marketplace."

Lan Fan stands up. "Now I'm actually sick."

Greed winces. "Sorry."

"Wait, Lan Fan, don't go", Ling says, standing up after her. "He'll answer anything."

Lan Fan glares. "Fine! Fine." She plomps down a good couple of feet from Greed. "Are you proud of those purchases?"

"Few of them where actually purchased", Greed mumbles to the ground.

"You stole people?"

Greed shrugs one shoulder. "Some."

"What is wrong with you? I can't believe- why would you do that?"

Greed's face twists. "I didn't- I wasn't going to let them there. To be sold like- they- whoever thought they could place humans as objects of trade- to the point where- it's-" He growls, rubs his eyes. "You know how I define 'possession'."

Lan Fan glares. Ling answers. "Yes."

"This, this thing. The right to call something mine." Greed lets his hands drop. "You get it."

Ling cocks his head. "Yes?"

"It's not about- what they thought. It's not, legal ownership. Having traded fairly for it."

"You're losing me again."

"Damn it Ling, you're supposed to know what my brain is like! I can't call you mine because I bought you, the point is that you call yourself mine!"

Lan Fan, subtle as a trainwreck, places herself between the two.

Greed covers his mouth. "No- I didn't- not you. Not you. I'm yours I'm yours I'm yours, you know that, Lan Fan please." He drops to the ground. "You know that. That's the point, please, you can't- I'm explaining this badly."

"Then do it better", she says.

"Ownership never had anything to do with my Avarice", Greed says, slowly, carefully, suddenly wondering if his body is capable of crying. (But it is, what a pointless question. He's cried so many times for so many reasons.) "Two weeks into existence and that much was clear to me: few things could be mine for a simple purchase. And people don't- actual living breathing human beings never even got close to that category. Those men and women I bought- few stayed with me, fewer were mine. Couldn't have been more than three. And even those left. I kept 'women' in my slogan because I still- still wanted women, you know that, fuck, why are you making me spill my guts all over?"

Lan Fan narrows her eyes. "Are you proud of those purchases?"

Greed frowns back. "I was proud they'd no longer be on display. I was terrified that that was the only way to get them out of there."

"There, where? What difference did the marketplace make?"

Ling gulps behind her. "Lan Fan-"

"There were work slaves and there were sex slaves", Greed says. "And fight slaves. But I never got any of those. They were rare because the good ones would escape and the bad ones were dead already. The trend didn't last long."

"Now I'm sick", Ling says.

"Sorry."

Lan Fan droops. "I didn't... I. I didn't mean to push you, Greed."

"It's fine; I said any question."

Lan Fan turns around, lays Ling on her lap. "What gives you the right to call something yours?"

Greed huffs, crawls around so he can see both of their faces. "Well, for starters, it has to be mine. You know how when you buy food, you don't really think of it as yours until someone tries to take it from you? Because it's temporary. You'll eat it and then it'll be gone, and the time between your purchase and your meal is short enough that your ownership is never challenged, so you don't think of it as yours. That's- that's the first thing, if I don't consider it mine, it's not."

Lan Fan hums. Ling closes his eyes.

"That's a bit tricky to understand, I guess", Greed admits.

"No, it's fine. When do you consider something yours?"

"Hm. If I can share it, it's mine. If I feel like I can't, it's someone else's, thus theirs to share."

Lan Fan raises her eyebrows. "What about people? Or animals, for that matter?"

"Living things", Greed smiles. "Don't exclude my siblings, c'mon. Living things need to consider themselves mine too."

"So how did that work with your chimera friends?"

"Keyword here being friends, I'll get back to you on that, but with people working for me, well. They were _my_ workers. So, mine."

"What about one-time workers?"

"Those always felt kinda borrowed. Like the food. They'd be gone so soon I'd never consider it. I guess it was the other way around, it was less like they were my workers, more I was their client."

"What about us?"

Ling opens his eyes now that the topic interests him again.

"Back into friend territory", Greed smiles. "D'you remember, Ling? You taught me it."

"The friendship? You had some fine ones on your own."

"No, the ownership of the friendship. You were the one who pointed it out. That friends sated me."

Lan Fan covers her mouth. "Greed the Avaricious? Sated? How shocking."

"Spare me", Greed says, flipping her off. "It's hard enough to say when you aren't bullshitting me."

"Say what?"

Greed fumbles for a moment, eventually settles for staring at his hands while he speaks. "That I figured how to sate my Avarice. It's- it's one thing for you to be mine, and another when I am yours, but. Those two together do the trick nicely."

Ling giggles. "Whose else have you been?"

"Father's, first, he made me. My siblings'. My friends' over the years, lots of people. Few combined the two well enough to sate me. And it didn't really count if I couldn't see what was happening, anyway."

Lan Fan pulls him down so he's lying in her lap next to Ling.

"Actually", Greed laughs, "y'all better be proud that you're two of the few alive who get to have me."

Lan Fan laughs along. "Who else does?"

"Alphonse, Edward. May, the way things are going."

Ling hums. The clock rings in the distance.

"Shit, already?"

"We should go to sleep."

"Yeah, let's."

"Greed, you're not getting out of those questions. Tomorrow it a big day."

"Yeah, my birthday."

"No, I meant like, chronically-- never mind."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know i usually update my fics daily but i'm on vacation and the internet connectivity here is kinda dead so i do what i can


	4. I'm going.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> nobody's actually leaving for real, sorry for the misleading chapter title

Alphonse and May are obnoxious enough to have two weddings - an Amestrian one and a Xingese one. No one sees the point, since they invite the same people to both. But it is a good excuse to meet with their friends again.

 

 

He vanishes.

He doesn't, of course, Ling and Lan Fan look to the other side of the table and Greed is still there. But everything else is so loud for a breath, so vivid and intense and _loud_ that it takes longer than that breath to realise that Greed's terrifying qi is gone.

Like a flicker he drops out of existence.

He's still there, but since they can't read him, he might as well not be.

And then he's back, noise and static low-key screaming as always. He looks down in horror, slowly pats himself down, glances at the back of his left hand with fear. All's in order and that should be assuring, but if there's no sign of harm, he can't begin to fix it.

"What was that?" Ling says, finally, after a small eternity of panic.

"I'm running low", Greed spits. "Shit. How do you read me?"

"You're... thinner, somehow. Not as in, slim, but um, the opposite of dense."

"Count me - count my souls, how many are there?"

Ling takes a delicate hold of Greed's tattooed hand, brings it to rest on his brow. "Less than a dozen. More than five."

Greed puts a finger in his own mouth, counts every sharp tooth. "Well fuck me. I need a Stone."

Lan Fan leans on the table. "Where the hell are you gonna find a Stone? No one makes them anymore. Not with Mustang in charge. And there's no way there've been Stones scattered left and right in Amestris."

"But if they are, they'll be in Amestris." Greed taps his damp finger on the table. "I'm going. I'll be back if I can, but no promises."

"You can't just leave", Ling frowns.

Greed pauses while standing up, looks at him. "It's a miracle, then. I can't leave, and yet... I'm leaving. Praise Truth."

Lan Fan stands up as well, hurls herself over the table, knocks Greed flat on his back.

And they pause right then, because Greed discharges red sparks on the back of his head.

"You will come back", Lan Fan says. "You won't teach anyone how to take life for your own survival. You will not kill."

Greed blinks. "Yes, yes, no."

Lan Fan growls.

Greed pushes her off. "I miss you already; I can't teach something I don't know; I can't promise no harm."

 

 

After about two weeks of wandering around Central, checking on old friends and gathering intel, Greed runs across one Edward Elric, plus baby tucked in the crook of his elbow.

"If it ain't my favorite bastard!"

"Right back at ya!"

They go grocery shopping for the Elric family, apparently they're staying at Central for a few days and they've gotten a bit too many to all fit in Gracia's apartment. Edward hands the kid over with all the care of a loving father, saying all the words of a hurt man:

"Fucker I swear on my good leg if I catch you so much as thinking about mishandling him I will eliminate your fucking ass. You know I don't kill but so help me, you will pay gravely."

Greed laughs, fits the baby in his arm. "I know how to hold the little shit, kid, don't you sweat over it. Whatcha name him, by the by?"

"Yuriy. It's, it's Winry's dad's name."

"Yeah, I wouldn't name my kid after my own father either."

Edward blinks for a moment. He facepalms and groans, finally picking up the grocery to get going. "We're cousins."

"More like brothers. Pops was a clone of yours, not a sib."

Edward continues groaning.

"You can still be older brother if you'd like! Hell, Alphonse can still be second, I'll be your littlest brother."

"Stoooooop."

"Why, big brother? I thought you were all about family."

"Desist. Spare me."

"But bro."

"Don't."

"My brotherino."

"I changed my mind, give me back my son, from now on I don't know you, I will ignore your existence."

 

 

He doesn't tell Edward, of fucking course not. He tells May, who finds the request logical, and together they tell Alphonse, who fights them over it.

"I'm not hunting down Stones for you!"

"That's not what I'm saying! I just need a few to survive, would you let me die?"

"You just said you have more than five human souls in you, that should be enough for more than five lifetimes."

"Not with the life I lead, kid. I'll die. Look just. Forget it. We can work this out without your help."

"I'm not letting you take May and just run-"

May growls. "He's not _taking_ me, I'm _going_ to help him."

Alphonse frowns. "May, please, think about it. Just, just think it through, and I'll support whatever decision you make."

"There's nothing to think about. Greed is _dying_ ; I'm helping him."

"Then I'll tag along."

 

 

May, of course, sees it as an excellent opportunity for a Pulse-reading lesson. Like hauling their asses left and right with the hope of catching a whiff of the terror feeling that is the Stone (all the while ignoring Greed's Stone that follows them everywhere) is a class, oh teach, teach, when's recess?

They find one in the west. It's packed tight and the doctor that had it is more than glad to get it out of his hands.

Alphonse fuses it in Greed.

Greed breathes easy again.

 

 

"I'm gone for seven months and _this_ happens?"

Lan Fan points at the hole in the wall like it wasn't obvious before. "They threw a bomb."

"What if I leave for a year? A decade? Are y'all gonna die?"

"Don't be ridiculous, love. They just thought we'd grow soft with you here, so your absence would be a chance to attack."

Greed laughs. "Morons."

Lan Fan hums.

 

 

Alphonse barges in the imperial bedroom with all the stealth of a screaming elephant. Lan Fan is halfway to slitting his throat, but thankfully manages to recognise him before she breaks skin.

"Alphonse what the hell. I almost killed you."

"I got it!" he yells. Like maybe he doesn't know he's indoors. Like maybe he can't hear. Like maybe he has a concussion.

Lan Fan takes a closer look to figure which one is the case.

Alphonse's nose is bleeding. His teeth are bloody, too. His eyes are bloodshot and he's limping so much Lan Fan has to catch him. He's also clutching the side of his head.

"What the fuck?" Greed says from the bed. "Who - what time - oh, great, Al."

"Greed I got it, I got it!"

"Got what?"

"The -" Alphonse mumbles off, brings his hand to his mouth. His red hand. Is his ear bleeding too? He's definitely concussed.

May runs up the corridor, gracefully stops before she steps in the room. "Gosh, I'm so sorry we woke you up. He was just testing a theory and-"

"At this hour?"

"It's not that late."

"It's almost morning."

May looks outside and decides Lan Fan isn't lying about the time. "Well, sorry anyway. And for intruding. I'd come take him but-" she raises her voice "-are you decent in there?"

"When have you ever known me to be decent?" Greed calls.

"Oh for the love- Greed, cover yourself", Ling goes.

Greed flips him off and covers himself in carbon. As he does. He then stands up to take a look at Alphonse.

"Ouch, was his theory about blunt force head trauma?"

"I'mmm right here", Alphonse says, humming a bit weirdly. He proceeds to collapse on Lan Fan altogether.

"Al!" May shrieks. She rushes to support his other side. "You need to lie down."

"God don't lie me on the bed Greed was sleeping on."

"What's your beef with my bed?"

"I used 'sleep' as an euphemism there, Greed, come on."

"Fair enough."

The floor would have to do. May's lap does for an excellent pillow, and by the time she places all her knifes -why the fuck was she carrying knifes in the dead of night- Ling crawls over as well.

"I got it", Alphonse keeps repeating as May heals him. "I did, I swear."

"What did you get?"

Alphonse opens his eyes, which are no longer bloodshot. "Greed!"

"Don't yell, kid, fuck."

"I got it! How to keeppp-puh-puh -uh- keep you alive without risking anyone finding out how to mmmake Stones!"

"You what?"

"Remember the um, theory I said brother and I were trying to m- uh, sh- foh- s- d- develop? Take ten, give eleven?"

"I... I think?"

"Well that, but with life. Here's what I just did-"

And then he passes out.

 

 

"So here's what I did last night", Alphonse says over breakfast, mouth full and pen and paper in hand. "I transmuted myself, right? Like you would a Philosopher's Stone. I made myself pure energy. It rebounded, as you could tell, but I figured if Ed could do it thrice without dying then so can I. At least, he could teach me. Maybe? I'm not sure when we'll both be in the same country again, much less within talking distance..."

"Dear, you're getting side-tracked", May says.

Suddenly Greed wishes Ling and Lan Fan didn't have Emperor things to do first thing in the morning (especially since Lan Fan had night shift and Greed was just stealing her hours right now).

"Right. Sorry. So I made myself into a Stone and used that to power something alchemically impossible, I wrote without ink. One entire letter - the letter 'k' to be exact - and then I made myself human again. I thought the rebound was the energy it took off of me, but that wasn't it. The energy should come in life force - as in, my lifespan - not injury. So the rebound was definitely because I performed it wrong."

"I'm losing you."

"What I'm saying is, I managed to use my own soul as an energy source without consequence."

"You just said it'd shorten your life."

"That's what brother had told me. But when May was checking me over this morning she said-"

"His life force isn't affected. He's fine - more than fine, he just proved an entirely new alchemical theory he developed himself. He literally took the ten of his soul and made eleven with the ink."

Greed raises his eyebrows, finally understanding. "Woah. That's actually impressive, Al. Props to you."

"No, that's not even the best part", Alphonse insists, pauses his manic writing to point at Greed with his pen. "This means we can power your life without killing anyone."

Greed takes a long breath. And holds it.

 

 

From the other side of the Palace, Lan Fan hears faint screaming in Amestrian. Cheering and cursing in the same breath.

Ah, so Alphonse did make some kind of breakthrough.

 

 

The kid-naming becomes kind of ridiculous. After Yuriy, Edward and Winry name their daughter Trisha and their second daughter Pinako. Alphonse and May name their first daughter Trisha, their first son Jin, second daughter Izumi, the twins Maes and Roy because Alphonse is sentimental and also an asshole, third daughter Lan Fan.

Lan Fan (the guard, not the baby) is really proud. Roy (the Fuhrer, not the baby) is between grateful and terrified. Ling once suggested they should've named the twins after him and Greed, how funny would that have been.

"Maybe we'll do that with the next pair of twins we adopt", said May, mere seconds before she rolled up her sleeves to throw down with the Emperor.

 

 

Lan Fan, despite appearances, gets sick quite often. Not anything worrisome, but she sneezes a lot, coughing here and there. Some untreated allergy, maybe, it never bothered her enough to have it checked, and it was never something she couldn't quiet for the sake of her job.

Anyway, that's not the point, the point is that Greed tries to tell himself she's just a bit sick while he's holding her hair back. It doesn't work - Greed can't even lie to himself.

So after Lan Fan is done puking her guts he starts fretting. "Do we need like an actual doctor or do you just need to rest - did you eat something or..."

Lan Fan furrows her brows at him. She takes off her mask and - yeah she looks like he's talking gibberish.

"My point is, how sick are you to be throwing up this early?"

She keeps staring for a moment, and then she smacks her forehead. "Oh- of course, you can't - I'm not sick, Greed, I'm pregnant."

"You what."

Lan Fan just raises her eyebrows at him.

"You what!"

 

 

Xing isn't big on naming kids after loved ones like Amestris is. Otherwise Greed would've expected the youngin' to be named Fu, because, well. That's what Greed would've picked.

They name him Mu. When Greed asks why, Ling just says they had to be sneaky, which answers exactly nothing.

Greed asks May. May, with tears and stars in her eyes, says it means 'desire'.

Apparently 'greed' isn't a legit name in Xingese either.

 

 

Alphonse has countless photos of Greed holding Mu. On the back he writes the date and little notes. Some of them are in Amestris, some of them are in Xing. Most, he keeps with him. There's a few that have Ling or Lan Fan or both in there, those get him out of trouble pretty often.

The most hilarious Greed photo to ever grace Alphonse's album is one where he's surrounded by all their kids, taken on the twins' seventh birthday in May's childhood home. The best part is that Greed is the only grownup in the photo. Also all the kids are blond save for Mu and Izumi and the twins themselves.

Greed doesn't want to ask if it's a Xerxian thing or a Hohenheim thing, and frankly he's kinda scared to know.

 

 

Mu learns the royal style of fighting, which is really such a mix it's amazing. Anything from graceful choreography to dirty cheating is included in this fighting, and it's gorgeous.

Plus, the kid is the first to grow up regularly sparring with an immortal, so there's that.

 

 

Alphonse is a very proud person. However he knows when he should be the shadow, probably a by-product of a life with Edward Elric. Edward, against whom Alphonse has a massive winning streak - that is to say, infinity to one. Alphonse is an overall very skilled fighter.

Mu, however, manages to beat him when he's just 13, and stops losing against him at 16.

May finds it hilarious.

Edward finds it terrifying.

All three of Mu's parents weep with pride.

Alphonse, as mentioned, is a very proud person. So while he's a bit sour after a loss, he's proud of Mu, and makes sure to compliment his fighting after every round.

 

 

(While Alphonse develops the ten-eleven theory in Xing, and the rest of East, Edward searches all over the West for inspiration on reversing human chimera bodies to their original form. It goes decently. Darious is the first to find his family.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lan Fan: oh, would you look at that, if i'm not majorly mistaken on reading my own dragon pulse, i'm pregnant. that's neat. i guess i don't have to make any announcement since my husband is the master of the dragon pulse.  
> Lan Fan, sometime later: (has morning sickness)  
> Greed: what the fuck. WhaT tHE fuCk. she's dying. i'm not ready. don't die. fuck  
> Lan Fan: i seem to have forgotten my other husband barely even understands the pulse as a concept. he seems about to pass out. hm. maybe i didn't think this through as well as i'd thought.


	5. """Journey's end"""

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> it's the last chapter! you know what that means ;)) time to change the archive warnings ;)))

Greed triple-checks that no-one's following him before he vaults over the stone fence. And then he's gone. He comes back two weeks later without explanation. Ling screams. Lan Fan grabs Greed by the hair - it's short enough that it slips out of her fingers, so she digs metal fingers in his throat instead - and growls.

Mu pretends like he believes whatever excuse they tell him.

 

 

The clans develop a nearly steady routine in their attempts to gain Ling's favour. Yao sends a new person every other week, Chang has the same couple of informants lingering in the Palace while they wait for the Chang Leader's kid to get to adulthood. A lot of the others have decided courting for Mu's hand in marriage is the way to go.

Mu is having none of it. His parents split the workload so their kid can rest; Lan Fan handles the unofficial offers, Ling is for the official talks and negotiations, Greed deals with the... less than polite approaches.

It works.

They're all tired, though.

 

 

Greed vaults over the stone fence. He runs into a guard who's given the choice to either shut up or be silenced. She chooses to keep her life, but word reaches Lan Fan either way.

 

 

Edward and Winry get the cutest granddaughter anyone could ever ask for. Greed is given the task of passing on the news, which puts him in the corner of figuring an excuse to have dropped by in Amestris without telling anyone.

 

 

It goes about as well as you'd expect.

Lan Fan puts her metal elbow to Greed's neck and chokes him.

"Do you have any idea what we could've lost?" she screams. "We were _attacked_ , and you weren't _here_ , this is your _job_ and _you left._ "

"Y'never seemed to have a problem dealing with attacks", Greed rasps. His throat sparks, but with Lan Fan's forearm pressing his trachea closed, he can't heal.

"We did now", she growls. "And you weren't here."

"I'm sorry."

She drops him. He coughs up a lung as he forces his healing into overdrive.

"Not yet you're not", she says. "You haven't seen him yet."

Greed, for a moment, is terrified to figure whether 'him' is his husband or his son, and then forces himself to be glad it wasn't 'them'.

 

 

It's Ling.

The left side of his torso is horribly injured, covered with bandages and compresses. He's sitting up, a pillow on the right of his back keeping him elevated until his shoulder heals. His thigh has a clear gush through it, and Greed doesn't really want to know what he'll see after his leg is unwrapped.

But he's alive. And he's glaring daggers at Greed.

"I'm sorry", Greed says before Ling can open his mouth. "How could I have known? I never wanted this, especially not to you." He kneels at the side of the bed, and it's low enough that he's at eye level with Ling. "I'm sorry. I should've been here to protect you."

"I don't need you to protect me", Ling rasps. "I need you to keep the danger out of our home. I'm glad it was me, Greed, but I can't count on luck to do the same next time."

Lan Fan, seated on the other side of the bed, bites her tongue, doesn't offer herself in place of her Emperor, doesn't scream to offer Greed and his infinite healing. Because all of those things combined are better than their luck turning on Mu.

"I'm so sorry", Greed sobs, face to the sheets. "I'm so sorry, love, I'm sorry."

Ling sighs with a hitch. "Were you at least doing something of importance, wherever you were?"

Greed sniffs, picks up his head to look at Ling. His left eye is also covered in bandages, and his right is bloodshot. "I was in Amestris", he says finally. His voice still trembles. "And I was... fuck, I was doing fuckall, I didn't even have any real reason to go, I should've been here."

Lan Fan scowls at him.

"No, you're right", Greed says. "You're absolutely right. The very fucking least I could have done is tell you. I just. I hate this whole thing." He runs a hand through his hair, catches his lip with his teeth. "Yuriy got a baby girl."

"That's lovely", Lan Fan spits. "Absolutely wonderful."

 

 

"Hey. It's me."

"Oh, Greed? Since when do you use the telephone?"

"Ha ha May, is Alphonse there?"

"What, no love for me? I'm hurt, Greed, obliterated."

"Ling is missing half his sides and one entire leg. Is Alphonse there?"

"What?!"

"Please just give the phone to Alphonse."

"One moment - DEAR COME QUICK IT'S URGENT - here you go, it's Greed."

"Greed?"

"Hey, Al."

"Is there something actually urgent?"

"Can I ask you for a big favour? I mean a huge one."

"Oh come on, Greed. How much bigger than 'getting a body' can it be?"

 

 

Greed begs and pleads to hell and back. Alphonse eventually concedes, arrives at the Castle, and then Greed begs and pleads some more. He also pleads with Mu, to get him to occupy Lan Fan - but that one goes terribly, because Mu spills right away and Lan Fan demands that she be there for the insanity they're about to attempt.

So she is.

Ling is against it, at first, but with Lan Fan there and Mu in mind, he agrees.

So Alphonse fuses Greed into Ling.

It somehow manages to hurt worse than the first time. Even without the structural rearrangement that Greed usually brings, red sparks for so long it becomes tiring to even look at. Ling's leg grows healthy and his skin heals and his eye sees again.

And then, when the sparking stops, Alphonse pulls Greed back out and into his own body. That, at least, hurts just as much as last time.

All three of them pass out.

 

 

Six hours pass, and Ling is the only unresponsive one, thus the only one in a coma. Alphonse can stay awake and even hold a conversation, but he's exhausted, so he sleeps some more. Greed can open his eyes for a few seconds, minutes at most, before he blacks out again.

Twelve hours pass and Alphonse is awake. He goes to bed early and wakes up very late for a few days, but he's fine, other than that. Greed can sit up. He even manages a few sips of water. Ling is still comatose.

Thirty hours pass and Greed is fine. Or, actually, exhausted to hell and back, and with vaguely limited control over his limbs, but he insists he's fine. Ling is still comatose.

At the fourty-hour mark Ling lets out a whine, but remains unresponsive.

Around fifty-two hours after the fusing, May transmutes Ling into consciousness to give him water and a bite to eat. He eats exactly one bite, then slips back into oblivion.

On the third day, Alphonse is on his way to the Palace's grand library when he sees Ling slithering his way to the kitchen.

 

 

Three days Ling is unconscious, and Mu has already picked a bride, proposed, got her clan's blessing, and Greed and Lan Fan's hesitant agreement.

Mu introduces her to Ling. She's the Chang clan's leader's kid, the one they'd bred and raised to get Ling's favour. Mu says he loves her and wants to marry her and asks for Ling's blessing.

Ling gives it, and quietly begs Mu to reconsider, that he doesn't have to do this.

Mu brushes it off, because he does.

Ling curses himself. He never meant to plague his son with thoughts of mortality like this.

 

 

When Greed next goes to Amestris, he lets everyone know. Ling and Lan Fan go with him. He walks them around places he's claimed as his, and if they notice the rows of white pebbles at the windows in every other place he takes them to, they don't comment.

They meet up with old friends. Lan Fan hadn't seen Yuriy since he'd been little - now he has kids of his own, and barely remembers her at all.

Heinkel doesn't actually believe them when they meet him. He even gets confused between Greed and Ling. It's hilarious.

On the way back to Xing, Lan Fan admits that the year when all those friendships were formed seems to stretch on and on in her head. They all agree - some events are too important to be blurred in with the ones surrounding them.

 

 

Something is very, very wrong with Ling.

Lan Fan's started to grey around the temples, and her skin folds more than it used to. And still, Ling is fresh and green, yet they're the same age.

He looks like he's aged, sure. But not as much as Lan Fan.

They think it might be stress - Lan Fan is constantly alert - but no. The rest of their friends are also showing signs of age. All but Ling.

Ling, who'd been fused with a monster that not only healed, but also didn't age.

Ling does not want to see his friends die.

Greed can't apologize enough.

 

 

There are so many grandkids. Greed is only really there for the birth of two: his own first grandson, and Alphonse and May's third. After that he doesn't try as hard to keep track.

 

 

It's been thirty-five years since Greed died the first time. A half-round number. It's apparently appropriate enough that his friends start dropping on that year.

Edward is the first to go, surprising no one, saddening everyone. But they've all spent their fair time screaming his ear out about using his own life as a source of energy, and that never led anywhere, so now everyone is quiet. The funeral is crowded - Edward did have a knack for befriending anyone he came across - and he's buried a few feet to the left of his mother's grave.

There's enough space around him to bury his entire family.

 

 

Lan Fan goes next.

In her last moments, while her husbands cling to her metal hands, she admits that it's only fair that she goes so soon. She's lived a very dangerous life, and she never wanted to see the day when she'd be old enough that her senses would fail her. She gives them both a kiss on the forehead, and then one to Mu, who otherwise is too choked up to get too close.

She says she's glad she doesn't get to see Ling die, and on the official record it'll be interpreted as a guard's joy for a lifetime's work done right.

On the private record, Ling will curse in large letters and stain the paper with tears as he offers himself in her place, against her wishes.

Lan Fan, too, is buried near family, Fu's grave standing humble next to the honours Lan Fan's is showered in.

 

 

At age fifty-nine May falls very ill. She spends a few months settling her scores, letting her family know how much she loves them. But she recovers, thank god.

 

 

Actually, no. Two years later she's ill with the same symptoms. Her scores are settled, so all she has to do is spread her love, and she dies peacefully in her sleep.

Alphonse is calm. He blesses her with a eulogy in both languages, and wishes her a safe travel to her resting place. He promises he'll follow, but that she'll have to wait.

No one thinks May would be upset about that. In fact, as Ling reads Alphonse's qi to make sure he's alright, he thinks he feels something urging Alphonse to lay back and take his time. Alphonse seems all too happy to do so.

 

 

Winry dies during summer. She dies surrounded by her kids and grandkids. She dies with Alphonse taking note of her last words. She dies with a smile on her face.

In his two and a half centuries, Greed has never encountered a death so peaceful it warranted the phrase 'she closed her eyes like she fell asleep'. He does now.

Winry is buried next to Edward. There's still plenty of space around them, for when it's time to meet their family again.

 

 

As soon as Alphonse loses his last sibling (even if she was officially only an in-law), he spends a few weeks apologizing to May's grave. When she was alive they'd discussed their graves and she said she was fine with it, in fact she encouraged it, but Alphonse apologizes again and again, face to the ground and words slipping between languages in a messy mutter.

He's gone a decade later. He's buried between his family, Winry and Edward to his right, Trisha and Hohenheighm to his left.

If May had held a grudge, it's gone after a decade of asking for her forgiveness.

 

 

Ling holds out.

Somewhere between the high life of an Emperor and Greed's numerous fusings, Ling lives to be one hundred and two years old.

The list of heirs he leaves behind has been public knowledge since he was eighty. Now it feels like a miracle that no one had murdered him to get the throne earlier.

Tradition dictates that he get his own place of rest, an entire building with carvings and wall paintings to tell his life story - Ling had asked that he be buried next to Lan Fan and near Fu.

Greed sees to it that that's what happens.

The building is still made - and Greed is there too, to make sure that the story's accurate.

 

 

And after that, he doesn't have any more reason to stay any longer. Greed's been married before - though never to two people at once - but he thinks he never cared this much. After all, most of his past marriages ended in divorce, and the one that'd ended with death, well. It was very quick. And it was the last one before Ling and Lan Fan.

He'd never had a kid before. Mu lives and prospers as a prince with his family, and doesn't ask for Greed to stay.

So he doesn't.

Greed travels the world - goes high and low, all around the globe. Stays in places, makes friends, gains power. Explores nooks and crannies of endless libraries, looks around the unstable houses of tiny villages, talks with the street rats of cities too large to care for the poor. Spends a few decades running countries here and there - twenty-one years as President of Creta, about nine as a minister in Drachma. A lucky two years as Furher of Amestris before someone who actually knows history points him out to the press and he goes from urban legend to infamous reality overnight.

Man, he loves it when that happens. Decades can blend together and slip away so easily, and then one event happens and it's so important that a single night stands out like the sun.

He remembers the few months leading up to his first death very clearly, with tiny details. He has trouble recalling the last years of his spouse's lives - what did they do in the afternoons? How often were there assassination attempts in Ling's forties? Did anyone attack Greed personally between Lan Fan's death and Ling's?

He can't be sure. But ask him what stupid thing Edward did the night before the Promised Day, and Geed can tell you.

(Edward bought two yards of bright red cloth and transmuted it into a long coat, with his teacher's symbol on the back. When the others had teased him about it, he invoked the power of morale, and Greed couldn't have blamed him. Greed can recall the exact crease in Edward's brow as he folded the garment up.

It's the only time Greed had seen Edward admit that he's scared. It didn't matter that it was indirectly.)

(He remembers shards and coils of Alphonse's armor scattered around May. He remembers Gluttony's regeneration glinting off of Lan Fan's metal arm the first time he'd seen it. He remembers Ling latching himself on Greed's soul, screaming and desperate and choosing death over letting go. He remembers Ling remembering fighting Wrath with Lan Fan's weight on his shoulder. He remembers Gluttony pleading in his last moments, word for word. He remembers that Mrs Bradley had managed to stand in a room with three homunculi and tip the odds in her husband's favour with something as careless as a misstep. He remembers that Ling wasn't above using their hunger to strangle control out of Greed's grasp. He remembers Winry setting the table for two members of her family and a handful of strangers with the same care she's give if they were all family. He remembers, on his first minutes of conscience inside Ling's body, May had managed to pick a fight with everyone in the room, which was three homunculi, a godling, a state alchemist, a suit of armor.)

(He remembers that she's buried without any of them around her, but when she visits her grave it's dozens of years later and her kids are with her.)

 

 

Greed travels the world.

He takes up a habit he hadn't developed in his two centuries before the kids - writing. He writes everything down. Thoughts, events, quotes. He imprints his experience on paper. He sometimes writes the same things more than once, but it doesn't bother him - the way he leaves notes scattered around the world, it's going to be a nightmare for anyone to track them all down, if anyone ever attempts to. Repeating himself is to the world's benefit.

He's sure he's written at least eleven books about the Promised Day that are the exact same. The story of how Lan Fan lost her other hand is in Central, a copy in the Imperial Palace. What Greed remembers of his conversations with Alphonse about inhabiting bodies that weren't theirs is a series of scattered notes, sparse enough that collecting them all will be actually impossible - hell, a few of those end up crumpled up and tossed into the sea.

Greed makes a large mark. Dozens of people seek him out for years just for the chance to talk to him. He speaks with historians, alchemists, politicians, artists. He fixes inaccuracies. He tells tales. He gains a lot of names, but his favorite one is The Story That Walks.

Because isn't that just what stories do?

 

 

He dies without anyone noticing. His Stone runs out 451 years after he was created. He slips back into legend status, and centuries afterwards, he's going to be scientifically explained as a really good historian who did exhausting amounts of research, and even inserted himself into history to make it more real.

It doesn't matter. History repeats itself. Eclipses come and go, and many humans attempt to use them, but none were arrogant or sacrificial enough to match the first attempt.

There isn't another Promised Day.

Greed isn't buried. His body becomes ash. Oblivion comes like an old friend.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i made myself tear up with this and i'm not sorry in the slightest

**Author's Note:**

> i've been working on this pretty much since i finished gghbb. recently i read Panic_CelestialInk's [Nothing Is Impossible](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8625445/chapters/19778911) and got super motivated to finish this up and start posting.  
> the working title for this was "bluh later"


End file.
